'Manual labour' and other joys of Motherhood

Occasionally you do get to put your feet up...

Right then, after all those shopping trips, I thought I will write a post about something that is even closer to my heart than shopping. Motherhood. Now I'm pretty much an established Mama of the whole 19 months and I know, or think I know, a thing or two about a wonderful world of mothering...

When you don't have a child, you either hear people say that it's the best thing ever - absolutely yes, although all good things come at a price - or they ('lucky' people that have children) warn you about loss of freedom - erm, yes, it's true, and loss of sleep - we've actually been very lucky with this one, but I've heard some horror stories (although now I said it out loud, we will probably have a sleepless night!). Anyway, so these are the most obvious presumptions about motherhood. But there are literary thousands more.

Guilt, for example, appears to be the most 'popular' amongst all the mamas (and papas of course) I got to know. In pre baby days I never really thought about that, but guilt comes hand in hand with motherhood and all the love that you feel for your precious little angel (or devil). Once you are a parent you feel guilty about pretty much everything... probably to the point where you feel guilty about feeling guilty!

Worrying. I've just got over the fact that Little Miss S's hands will never be clean enough and that it's not the end of the world if she picks up an ancient looking biscuit crumb from the floor once in a while and eats it... At the beginning of my journey into motherhood I used to carry antibacterial wipes everywhere.

Frazzled brain. I constantly find myself thinking about ten things at a time. Whilst I think, I also make to do lists in my head (cannot do written lists), watch Little Miss S getting closer and closer to grabbing my BlackBery and smashing it to the floor, worrying about Little Miss S hurting herself and thinking whether I will need to buy a new BlackBerry. Feeling guilty that I'm not in control of the whole situation...This is just an example of many examples.

Manual labour. No one ever told me that there will be so much lifting involved in motherhood. So, you lift your child in and out of pram, in and out of cot, in and out of highchair, in and out of car seat, in and out of shopping trolley, in and out of bath... And if you are not lifting your child then you are lifting a pram in and out of boot (whilst holding your child and two shopping bags...maybe even a dog). And it's not just lifting, it's catching, running, bending over, jumping... I try to go to the gym in evenings (that's if I'm not being distracted by wine and My Hubby's delicious cooking ...), but by the time I get to the gym I already feel like I've done a triathlon. On a positive note - you are pretty much guaranteed a very muscly looking arms!

Shopping: bags

Here we go, day two of my shopping for a perfect Mama wardrobe S/S2013!

So after shoes, girl can never have too many handbags. Actually, let me rephrase that. Girl should have at least one good quality handbag. Handbag either 'makes or breaks' the look (my Mama told me so and she knows, she is a fashion designer)... There is, of course, another theory about handbags being good investment pieces (think classic Hermes or Chanel)... something that My Hubby finds very difficult to comprehend. One day, hey!

Anyway, this is what we found:

This Kate Spade bag is my favourite for summer. Simply stunning

Another Kate Spade creation. Love the colour

Anya Hindmarch. Perfect for the office.

Leghila washable(!) bag available at Fenwick Bond Street. Actually, Fenwick, together with Liberty London, is one of the best places to go if you are looking for something really special and different. They always stock something a little bit quirky or 'with a little bit of zest' as I like to call it.

Annabel Ingall available at Fenwick Bond Street. Perfect Mama bag. Very spacious and look at that colour!

I am in love with Wilbur and Gussie clutches. They are both pretty and quirky. And see what I mean about that 'zest'?!

 

Nsew bags also available at Fenwick Bond Street. Loving those bold colours. 

Now then ... this little beauty from Clare Vivier has been purchased by moi! Perfection in my eyes. Available at Fenwick Bond Street.

 

And last, but certainly not least, Longchamp, of course. I have slight addiction to Longchamp bags... Put this one on my Wish List. Perfect for travelling.

 

Here is me at the scarf department in Peter Jones, Chelsea. I wore:

Trench coat: Massimo Dutti

Jumper: Ralph Lauren

Scarf: H&M

Jeans: 7 for All Mankind

Ballet pumps: Blue Velvet

Bag (2 of them!): Peter Jones collection and Longchamp

(I only have half face because this is how my mum took a photo ...don't ask)

 

 

 

                                       And here is my little helper, my Mama. She wore:

                                       Trousers: Gant

                                       Chelsea Boot: Russell & Bromley

                                       Cardigan: MaxMara

                                       Bag: Longchamp

                                       Scarf: Zara

                                       Trench: Jaeger

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Shopping: shoes

Warning: this post contains quite a few images of lovely looking shoes (some of them are not very reasonably priced)!

My personal shopper aka Mother is in town for a few days so it's a great opportunity to update my currently pretty much non-existent S/S2013 wardrobe!

Destination: Kings road, Harrods and Fenwick at Bond Street

These little beauties are from one of my favourite shops in London - Blue Velvet on Kings Road. They were the first pair I tried on and after trying on many many more afterwards (and much more expensive), I came back and got them! Love everything about them and they are really comfortable, which is an important aspect when you have a toddler.

Funky flats. Hogan Katie Grand Collection available at Harrods

Pink Todd's available at Fenwick

Classic Ferragamo. Love these. I own a similar pair in navy. Had them for over five years. These will never ever go out of fashion. Could be justified as an investment piece...

Good enough to eat!

Costing around £500, these are just a little bit over my budget...but I just had to try on Charlotte Olympia. So cute

 

 Guilty pleasure - sparkly Gina flats

And Giuseppe Zanotti

Studded Zanotti!

Tory Burch does great everyday flats

Repetto at Fenwick. Also great for everyday

I was very tempted to get these ankle boots from Acne. They are simple stunning...

Gorgeous evening shoes by Rupert Sanderson. Love the detailing

Sexy Alaïa

Adorable. I absolutely loved these Valentino heels. Pretty please!

 

Detail. LK Bennett available at Fenwick

Perfection. Lucy Choi at Fenwick

Next time - bags!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Holiday where I can breathe easy ...




Coffee and thoughts on the lake ...

We are trying to book a holiday. And it's like mind vs heart or sense vs sensibility...All inclusive convenience vs simple place where we can just be left 'to be'.

With Little Miss S now being an established toddler this particular holiday is going to be slightly different from the last one. She now needs lots and lots of space (safe space!) to run around and explore. Preferably with a few toys on site that we do not need to transport all the way from London. Something extremely close to the beach. Well, actually on the beach so when the nap time comes we can swiftly and quickly retreat to our room (ideally overlooking the beach and the sea) without walking or driving in the heat. We need something where meals are constantly being served - so if for whatever reason, be it tantrum or boredom, we need to leave - we can always come back later... You see where I am heading now...to my worst nightmare - all inclusive holiday. OK, so I am slightly over exaggerating. It is not actually the worst thing that can happen. I appreciate every single holiday I go to, no matter how many holidays I have already been on. I never stop being excited because, I think, once you lose excitement and appreciation of your travels, you pretty much lose interest in life. I never ever hated any of my holidays. It's just that I, or actually we as Hubby has the same opinion, very much prefer to do things in our own time, on our own terms rather than being tied up to the whole 'schedule' of all inclusive. Holidays that I really cherish and immensely enjoy are actually holidays to 'simple' places. We all need a bit of luxury and papering from time to time but, actually (honestly), too much luxury can get rather tiring. The problem with luxury is that you have to keep up with it. So for instance, if you are going for a meal at the end of your 'hard day' on the beach of your 5 star plus hotel, you still need to look luxurious and sometime looking luxurious is too much of an effort. Sometimes you just want to disappear, to blend in with the locals, to not care, to not think, to not pretend, to not try. You just want to be. To breathe easy without anyone watching you.

I have a few places like that. One of them is our summer house on the lake in Lithuania where you wake up early in the morning and drink your coffee on the lake in just your pyjamas...well, actually just your bikini bottoms...naked if you are comfortable with that. Sun is shining, fish are jumping. You can hear your neighbours across the lake but you cannot see them... Sauna, beers and night time swimming in the lake under the moon. Fresh smoked fish (neighbour has a smoking house). Local women can bring you fresh bread, milk and honey from the village. You can spend the whole week in just your bikini. No make-up, no worrying about what to wear... a week there and your mind is so clear you sometimes forget who you are. We are going there later in the summer.

We also go to this place in Greece. Went there while I was still pregnant with Little Miss S and keep going back. It's our secret escape. So simple but so nice. The gem is basically in the people. We got to know the owner of the apartments and we got to know the people who run a lovely authentic Greek taverna near by. Nothing fancy, very simple but very welcoming. You feel part of their community there and that's another thing that I love about travelling. I want to learn about the culture and food. To form friendships.

As I'm typing this I'm feeling more and more aprehensive about the all inclusive (no matter how luxury) option... The routine of 'all inclusive' makes me want to cry. Holidays should not be timed. But, of course, there are lots of advantages in having everything done for you... that, or we just find a villa right on the beach with a lovely family run restaurant next door and super-reliable occasional babysitter near by... Decisions decisions, hey.

We have been getting ready for our holidays by spending Bank Holiday Weekend at Whitstable Beach.

I wore jeans from my favourite brand 7forallmankind, top from Zara (last season), belt from Whistles and navy ballet pumps from prettyballerinas.
Little Miss S wore jeans and hat from vertbaudet and top from Zara Kids.


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Hats off ... Everything off!

Parcel arrived this morning. Not for me. For Little Miss S from Vertbaudet (courtesy of mummy and daddy). Part of her Spring/Summer 2013 wardrobe ( mine is still in Selfridges and will probably stay there for quite a while...). Didn't bother trying on all of the items that I bought as otherwise it would turn into a very lengthy process (toddlers are not the most easiest creatures to get dressed). I'm sure everything will fit and everything looks super pretty. Tried the hat though, which, surprise surprise (not surprised one bit) came off straight away! We had this problem already with our winter hat. A stylish beret had to be replaced by a very practical all-in-one (scarf and hat - once the scarf is wrapped around the neck, hat doesn't come off)! Same story with gloves. Literally had to tie them around her wrists with strings! I gave up on pretty things (hair bands, ribbons ... no chance), but I just want to make sure that she doesn't get a cold or a sunstroke!

Last summer was easier. Little Miss S was still a baby and the hat stayed on during our beach holidays. This year things are trickier! Even putting on a sun cream is a mission very much impossible. More goes onto my hands than her face.

Did someone say that newborn stage is the hardest?! I'm not entirely sure about that ...and we haven't even reached 'terrible twos'!

Take this stupid thing off me!

Thoughts ... and Apple Tart 'Maman Blanc'

Where is my supper, mummy?

I was browsing through a couple of Lithuanian magazines that mum brought with her (for me) when she was visiting, one interesting quote caught my eye. The protagonist of the article was saying how important her children are to her and how much she tried to protect them from pain during the divorce. When times got really difficult she went to see a psychologist. She expressed her desire to help her children and he said, "Have a look at the instructions on the plane during the emergency landing - put on your oxygen mask first before helping your child". Genius! I just thought this was such a brilliant comparison. I see it like this. Before trying to help or guide your child you need to be in a fit state to do so. This doesn't just have to be applied in extreme situations like divorce. It could be used in everyday life. In the whole core notion of upbringing. I think that, unconsciously, that is what all parents are trying to do anyway. Trying to be the best at everything. Trying to improve themselves. Trying to set examples. You cannot teach another person something that you know nothing about.

Very simple comparison (nothing too deep) - cooking. As a child I always relied on my mum's cooking. She is an outstanding cook. As got got older, I developed fond memories of our meal times. I always knew and know now that mum can prepare something out of nothing. My childhood experiences shaped  a belief that mum is a person who will always feed you (forget feminism, sexism or anything like that here ... it's all about precious childhood memories).

In pre-baby days I was not the greatest cook. I always used to leave it to either My Hubby or Mr Chef at whatever restaurant we were eating out. Once Little Miss S was born, I had to become the one that my daughter could rely upon for feeding. I was frightened. I wanted to do everything just right. More so, I wanted to be perfect at cooking just like my mum. I cook everything from scratch so it has been a bit of a learning curve, but I think I did fine (minus a few burnt carrots at the beginning).

Over a year on and I developed a huge passion for cooking (sometimes I still have to pinch myself...is this really me?). And it's not just cooking for Little Miss S. It's cooking for everyone. Oh, and baking! Baking, in my eyes, was reserved for perfect 'grown-up' women with immaculate houses who had everything under perfect control (country cottage, Aga and Cath Kidston apron basically). My baking, in pre-baby days, was done by a good friends called Waitrose and Patisserie Valerie. Not anymore.

Here is one I made earlier. My mum phoned and said that she has this amazing recipe for super delicious tart and that I should try it. My mum is my greatest adviser on food. She has impeccable taste in food and yet she has been same size Tiny all her life. So she must be making all the right choices!

I absolutely love tarte tatin, but Apple tart 'Maman Blan' (Raymond Blanc) is a new competitor. It's like a skinnier and more elegant version of tarte tatin. It literary melts in your mouth. Oh, and it is actually very easy to prepare even though you cannot cheat and have to make your own pastry (my 'old self' would have given up by now).

You will find the full recipe here. I used Braeburn apples and didn't use calvados as Little Miss S also tried this it (and loved it!).

tarte tatin

Oh, you beautifull spring!

Well, at last sunshine the whole weekend. Warmth. Colour. Food outside! Happy people. Oh, how I missed spring. We spent the entire weekend outside (park, garden, outside cafes). By the end of each day I felt slightly dizzy from all the fresh (or as fresh as it can be in London) air. Even Cayman the dog is knackered today after running riots out in the open for two days. Oh, and Little Miss S. How much fun did she have?! She has red cheeks, couple of bruises and lots of muddy clothes. She was rolling around on the grass, chasing poor Cayman and then pouring the entire content of dog's water bowl over herself. I, normally not a big fan of stains and dirty hands, just watched all of this scene unfold with a smirk on my face and glass of Sauvignon Blanc in my hand. Sod all the grass and mud stains. How amazing to watch your child explore new things in the garden or a park. She even tried ice-cream for the first time! Well, daddy gave her some, and I, with two scoops of salted caramel in my hand, decided not to protest, and then even gave her some of mine. Spring does crazy things (wink, wink)!

Two downfalls of warm weekend outside. 1. On a Monday morning the house looks like it pretty much needs to be rebuilt from scratch. 2. I should really be going gym tonight after all the steak, barbecued sausages, roast chicken, cheese, more cheese, gazillion crisps dipped in houmous, chocolate tart with cream, toasted sandwiches, salmon bagels, ice-cream ... all washed down with quite a few glasses of vino...

Whose idea was to put Little Miss S in a skirt?! Oh, my Hubby's actually!

Date night

I am not a great fan of the phrase 'date night', but I suppose once you are a parent that's what it is when you and your partner venture out for dinner. In pre baby days it was just 'dining out'. We used to eat out so much that I think it actually stopped being something special and became a norm. Something special was probably dinner in! Now it's the opposite. We cook a lot in the evenings (with a bottle of wine - as I type this, Hubby is preparing steak) which I absolutely enjoy (nothing better than eating a lovely dinner in your tracksuit bottoms) but, from time to time, it's nice to be 'in a nice place, surrounded by nice looking people, whilst looking pretty nice yourself'. I find that our best ideas about the future are born on these 'date nights' . I suppose once you have no distractions of BBC News (or worse - One Born Every Minute) you really start talking. Hubby and I have been together for over 10 years and yet we tend to talk non-stop! Remembering, planning, laughing, commenting. Extra bonus this time - my mum was visiting, which meant we could completely relax in the knowledge that Little Miss S was absolutely fine (well, actually more than fine - completely spoilt).

Initially the plan was to book either The Ivy or Nobu ... somewhat of an obvious choice for 'date night'. However, we left it too late and obviously couldn't get a table. So we ventured out without any reservations. To be honest, spontaneous choices are always the best ones ... Barrafina, which currently is one of the best tapas bars in town operates no reservations policy, but two hour wait whilst watching others eat (even with a glass or two in hand) was just too long (leave this one for a weekday rather than weekend). So off we went wondering round Soho and eventually ended up in Randall and Aubin - French Seafood and Oyster bar. We have been meaning to go there many times, but the long queue outside (yet again no reservations policy unless it is lunch) has always put us off. This time there was only a small queue (although it got very big once we were happily eating away at our table), so we decided to wait. In fact, waiting for half an hour whilst sipping rose and watching chefs cook is not really such a hard work! The atmosphere is really buzzing. They play house music - not too loud so you can have a perfectly normal conversation and a laugh without other dinners hearing you. This is great because I really dislike places that are so quiet that you have to really watch what you are saying.

This place is compact and packed but yet it still feels like you have your own personal space. We managed to get a small bay area by the wall which was very cosy. Also, despite the no reservation policy, you are not being rushed. We stayed there for around 3 hours (nothing worse than watching the clock).

Oh, and the food, of course! It's perfect if you are a seafood lover like me. We had grilled Oysters with spicy tomato sauce (I suddenly develop this enormous hunger as I type this), grilled Lobster, grilled baby Scallops with pancetta, Crab salad, roasted Langoustine ...  All washed down with a crisp cold Rose wine (lots of it) and finished off with Flambéed Vanilla Crème Brulee. Heaven on earth.